I’ve seen a lot of links to articles with tips for women on how to dress, what to do, what to say, and I thought I’d add my own list. So here it is, the top ten things that are unattractive in women.
1. Sympathising with the Nazis
Ladies, you know how it is. You go on a first date with a guy and conversation just dries up. I know you’re searching for something to talk about, but how you think the Nazis were right just isn’t first date material. Save it for the honeymoon.
2. Not Washing for Weeks
It’s a pain. The endless things men expect you to do for them to stay attractive. If you really want to make your man’s heart sing, you’re going to have to grit your teeth and take a shower every so often.
3. Keeping Things in Body Cavities
Who couldn’t sympathise with the lack of pockets in women’s clothing, but try to refrain from keeping things anywhere difficult to reach. After all, having to dig around in your armpit to get change for the meter won’t get you that ideal man.
4. Chewing on Your Clothes or the Furniture
It’s a long wait at a restaurant and your stomach is rumbling. We’ve all been there. Perhaps ask for some bread, before you devour the fringes of the tablecloth.
5. Bringing Multiple Men on a First Date
You might think this is a real time saver. And it saves money to boot, when the check comes. But a lot of men object to being one of six on a first date with you. Calling each course an elimination round will not soften the blow.
6. Stealing from Him
It may seem like he’s asking for it. After all, he’s keeping his wallet in his back pocket like a chump. All you need to do is move in and grab it. Remember, though, he’s going to be reaching for it when the check comes. And won’t it be embarrassing when you have to help him look for his “lost” wallet for an hour?
7. Insulting Him
Try to avoid telling him that his face looks like a bowl of dog food. Or that his arms are as hairy as a clogged drain. Despite men’s reputation for being able to take more emotional abuse, quite a lot of men object to being constantly insulted.
8. Eat in an Unpleasant Manner
We learn from history that a lot of cultures used to eat with their hands. And how are you meant to wolf down food and entertain your date if you can’t speak with your mouth full? A little spitting is just collateral damage, right? Wrong. Men are delicate creatures and prefer not to be washing your spaghetti carbonara out of their hair later. Try to copy other diners in the restaurant in the way they use those metal things beside the plate.
9. Punching Him
If you can possibly avoid it, try to avoid assaulting anyone on your date. I know the man’s face is just asking for it, but if you really don’t like him or anyone else, please suggest ending the date early.
There is no better way to melt a man’s heart than with a smile. Flinching and grimacing at everything he does, however, might not work the way you think it does. Men aren’t good at reading body language, but when he touches your arm and you throw up a little, he may well notice.
There you have it. My list of things that men will find unattractive. Depending on interest, I may well write a list of things men find attractive. As a teaser, I’d say it will include: breathing oxygen, being conscious and common interests.
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